Seeing your ex pop up on your Snapchat again can feel like a whirlwind of emotions.
Memories of your time together start flooding in with each Snapchat story he posts.
I was like you one time, dear reader. My ex Nick broke up with me and was overall pretty nasty to me.
But when I saw him on my Snapchat again, I was taken right back into a very dark place. Suddenly my focus went from my healing to him.
The way I used Snapchat changed when my ex added me
When my ex-boyfriend added me on Snapchat, everything about how I used the app changed. I no longer was using it carefree as a way to connect with friends.
No, it had turned much more complicated than that. I was still using Snapchat, but I became hyper-aware of everything.
Did my ex watch my Snapchat story? Did my ex break our Snapchat streak? Who is that on his story? Wait! Why did he screenshot that Snap I sent him?
Yeah, he screenshot one of my Snaps without replying to me. Imagine the horror that ran through my mind. This brings me to another lesson, dear reader.
Don’t have any expectations if your ex-boyfriend adds you on Snapchat.
I had expectations of positive interactions with my ex on Snapchat. I never entertained the idea he would screenshot my Snap with no reply.
That hurt. Honestly. It hurt even worse because I had such high expectations. All the healing I had done suddenly felt reversed.
Adding my ex on Snapchat wasn’t worth it.
What are you hoping to gain out of being reconnected via Snapchat?
If what you’re craving with your ex is a genuine, authentic connection, then you will be very disappointed with Snapchat. When you don’t get the reaction you were hoping for, it will hurt you. When you do get the reaction you want from him via Snapchat, it will keep you hooked. Either way, you’re losing. The only temporary win is the dopamine rush when he opens your Snap right away, watches your story, starts a streak, etc.
But dear reader, don’t sell yourself short on such an unfilling connection.
Snapchat won’t help you heal from your breakup.
Snapchat is designed so that you use it daily. The application is designed so your ex will have very little accountability. Your ex-boyfriend’s Snaps will self-destruct and leave no trace. That’s really not what you want. You want memories to feel remembered. Not these temporary moments of validation Snapchat provides.
If you’re the type who likes to have receipts in a relationship, Snapchat won’t provide you that. You will have absolutely no accountability on Snapchat. It’s the wild, wild west for your emotions… Your very vulnerable, raw breakup emotions.
Snapchat filters will be used with your ex-boyfriend.
Don’t you want to appear like your 100% authentic self with your ex? You don’t want to be using Snapchat filters when you communicate with your ex-boyfriend to appear confident.
However, that’s very difficult to do with an ex who presumably saw you naked before.
So, avoid adding your ex-boyfriend on Snapchat. Chances are absolutely nothing lasting or undeniably beneficial will come out of the experience.
The app has the potential to connect you with your next love. New friends. Experiences that will heal you. Don’t give that up because your ex added you back on there and now you’re paralyzed about what to do.
Honestly I think my ex is adding me back on Snapchat just to try and get me to start another streak with him.